All i ever want to do is cut myself....why not just give in.
What is the point of trying to stop. No one cares. Your only hurting yourself

What is the point of trying if no one cares...
what is the point of screaming if no one will listen...

10/21/2012

Wow, i haven't been on here in forever. :( sad day. Everything's has been so crazy. i keep going back and forth n every decision that i have ever made. But the two things that stay the same is skinny, and cutting. I want to be skinny more than anything. People always say that girls with eating disorders look in the mirror and see themselves fatter than they actually are...well sometimes i look in the mirror and think that maybe i am fatter than i see myself. I mean i already see myself as fat. But what if i am really really fat and i just don't see it. Like my mind is warping my image of myself. And i am really fat. It scares me so much. The second thing that never changes is me wanting to cut. I always want to cut. My razor blade is the only thing in my life that stays constant. It's always there for me, and it never disappoints me. It's my security blanket. It's my favorite tool when painting a sad picture. A sad picture that is written all over my body. A sad picture that reminds me of everything i have gone through. All the hard i have overcome. In a way i love my scars. They have an unseen beauty.